Reflection

This year has been a very blessing and meaningful year for me. Thank's to God I can spent this whole year in Sydney although in the end I have to end my journey by coming back to Jakarta. I admit living in Sydney has trained me a lot about many things that I never thought about them before. This wonderful journey has taught me three main things:

1. Thanksgiving to God

That we always need to thank's God for everything that given to us. Sometimes we are often take things for granted. We always complain if we are facing such bit difficulties and problems. We forget that there are people who suffer a lot tougher condition. We failed to remember that God has given us some many blessings through many ways, although in fact we are not worthy to receive these. I think we need always to think of others and God's mercy before complaining.

2. Surrender to God

Another important thing that I learnt throughout this year was surrender. I admit that I am a kind of person that hard to let go something that I want. That caused me so much stress. But after all of the experiences, I realised that God always in control. He is a perfect planner. Nothing under his control can ever be out of control.

3. The important of having a fellowship

Having a christian fellowship is one of important way to help you grow in God. It is because sometimes we are weak and not strong enough to face problems or sometimes we need to communicate with others about God. Through fellowship we can find suport from others and grow together in Christ.

Probably there are many things that I haven't mentioned about, I pray that God will continue to help me grow although I am not in Sydney anymore.

Collosians 2:6-7 "So, then just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord continue to live in Him,
rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with
thankfulness."

Time to say good bye.

Today 28th December is my schedule to go back home. The feeling is quite similar when the first time I left Jakarta for Sydney, anxious, sad but excited too. I feel very grateful because I can experience studying overseas. This experience has broader my knowledge, not necessary in term of education but has also opened my eyes and mind about the meaning of life and spiritual growth. It is such a precious treasure that money can't buy. Thank you God.

I also want to say thank you to my best friends, lidia, ronny, windy, franky, yosi and hanvy who have given me so many excitement and help while I was studying in Sydney. Thank's guys. Keep in touch though we are separated by geographical boundary.

One more week to go

The time continues ticking. Christmas is coming soon, which means I will leave Sydney soon. So far my preparation to go back is going well. I've sent back all of my stuff back home except my summer clothes hehe.. and this last two weeks I've been trying to find a new job. Suprisingly, I've got one response, I hope it is a good start. Keep trying, I wish I will get a job that I desire.

On the other hand, Hanvy, my flatmate, hasn't got people to replace me. I hope by the time, there will be someone. A bit sad to leave her hehe, she is such a good companion, good friend to talk and discuss with. thank you for your support mate.. :)

hmmm, I think I need to start doing some reflection..

oz landmark. 

library - the source of knowledge. 

quadrangle - commerce faculty 

congrats for the achievement. :) 

scientia - the three of knowledge 

M com. 

Graduation means ?

Finally the official result of my exams have come out today. Although it is not as good as my previous semester, I am quite satified. At least I finished my study hehe.. and hold a master degree. :)

This week has been full of graduation celebration. On monday I went to Manly beach with Lidia, Yosi and Franky then ended up with having dinner at Hurricane's.. Ribs nyumm.. On Tuesday watched movie "National Treasure", it was really a good movie, I loved it. Then Wednesday, graduation photo taking session, continue with farewell cruise for all of international student who will graduate this semester on the next day.

Hmmm after so much excitement, I think I need to back to the reality. It is like a deja vu for me. I still remembered when I graduated from my bachelor degree, at first felt really relief when completed the study. However, the show still need to continue on, it was not the end of the journey, but actually it was a beginning of a new story. I think with my second graduation would not be so much different. Looking for new job and adjusting with new environment. I think that's life, there always be challenges, otherwise people will get bored. :) In spite of this, people sometimes hate difficulties like I said previously in my first writing. They like to play safe rather than facing risk. Probably in some situation we can avoid the situation that we don't like, but what if we have no choice ? yeah, only God has the answer. Like what I read a phrase sometime ago, it said "Safety is not about the absence of the danger, but the present of God".

Follow your heart ?

I like to turn on my radio while I am studying. The sound of the radio is only to make me awake and not feel lonely. However, I seldom really listen what the radio said. Last week while I was studying as usual I turned on my radio. It was 10.00 pm. Usually at that time there is a reflection. I felt very bored at that moment, so I decided to listen to the radio for awhile. I don't know what the exact topic was, but something catch my attention, When the speaker talked about most of people live their life by following their heart. Do you think heart is a proper guidance for our life ?

We often confuse when we have to make a decision in our life such as, career and marriage. Most of people say "just follow your heart", which is really misleading advice according to the speaker. It is because the bible say ‘The human heart is most deceitful and desperately wicked.’ (Jeremiah 17:9). then ‘He who trusts in his own heart is a fool.’ (Proverbs 28:26) what should we follow then ?

I think bible also clearly describes how Jesus obey and follow His father's will. When Jesus was in Gethsemane, He was terified and pray to His Father, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will" (Mat 26:39). Another example is Mary, Jesus's mother. When she was chosen to give birth to a son, although she was a virgin. She accepted God's plan by answering "I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered. "May it be to me as you have said" (Luke 1:38). Sometimes we don't like what God want us to do, because it is not interesting, it is not what we want, it is uncomfortable. However, God promises in Jeremiah (29:11) "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." In conclusion, do not follow what your heart want, but follow God's will, follow God's plan, pray that God will give us guidance What He want us to do.

The past four weeks or so

Due to exams I have abadoned my blog for two weeks. Finally, I finished my last paper yesterday. Hmmm feel so relief.. but still worry about the results. This semester will be my last semester, I have to pass in order to graduate. Ok, let's forget exams for awhile, i just want to share my days during the past four weeks. I have posted the pics below, you can see the chronology, bottom up.

The very bottom of the pic is about four weeks ago. It was on Lidia's birthday. We went to double bay and ate a big portion of ice cream hmmm so yummmy.. Actually it just happened, we didn't plan it. The story started from in the afternoon on that day, I posted a mass email to about seven friends from the office, asking whether we wanted to make a surprise for Lidia later that day. However, I got no response, so I thought the surprise will not happen. Then after finish my work, I went to buy gift for Lidia with Ronny, then He asked whether we want to go to Lidia's place later in the evening. Hmmm, then I called Franky and Yosi, and they would like to join. So we went to Lidia's place. At first she thought that it was only me came to visit her on her day, and suddenly the other three cute guys appeared hehehe.. then we decided to go to double bay. We were really very happy that night. You can see our big smile from the pic. It was also the happiest night I ever had since I was in Sydney. Thank you for Franky, Yosi and Ronny who make this unexpected surprise happened.

The second pic was taken when we celebrated Lidia's birthday at her place. She invited us to her house and cooked for us. We got plenty of yummy food, I can't remember what they are hehe, but as far as I know they were so yummy especially they contained vitamin "G" (Read:Gratis hehe). Two weeks after that, I had a coastal walk from coogee to bondi beach with my flatmate. We had a very good time, when we reached "Sculptures by the Sea". That was the third pic all about. The fourth pic was taken in the evening after the coastal walk. We went to woolomoolo to have hot dog as our dinner.

After so much having fun, I need to start to prepare my exams. Eventhough this semester is much lighter than my previous semester, still I don't want to slack off with my study. oh my goodness, I've just realised my face is so serious while I am studying. The pic was taken without my consciousness. It was my flatmate. At that time she was in my room, because I was so serious with my study, I just ignored her. Hmmm, actually she acted as paparazzi at that time :).

Finally the last pic was the christmast tree light event at Darling Harbour. That was on the day of my last paper. In fact I felt really bad about my last exam. It was really hard, I still worry whether I will pass the subject. However, nothing I can do now, the exam was over. The only thing I can do is pray to God. I need to surrender it to Him, whatever the result will be, there must be a purpose behind it.

christmas tree light 

preparing for exams 

hot dog yummyy... 

world through my glasses 

together and smile 

one two three four five HI-5 

I kissed my "part-time job" for good bye.

Time goes so fast. My day in Sydney is only less than 2 months. I have finished my last lecture last wednesday, and I end it up by going to La Perouse beach with some of my classmates. We were having ice cream mmm yummy..

and today is my last day in the office. Still remembered, I was introduced to this office by my friend, Edwin. Because of His excellent reputation I can work here, thank you to Him and thank's God for giving me so many caring and great friends since I was in Sydney.

I am very grateful can experience such professional work here. Although technically I didn't gain many new knowledge, I get some ideas of how to build a good relationship among employees in the office. Quite often as a boss, people demand his subordinates to do their tasks well. However, don't forget to praise them if they do a good job. That's what i see the culture here, the boss always appreciate whenever their team completed the tasks well, even it was a simple job. It make me realised the importance of appreciation. Sometimes when we are in the such high position we forget that we can't do anything without our subordinates. We act as suppose we have a power over them, then they oblige to respect, obey or even afraid of us. I hope I will always remember this matter the whole of my life. Who knows someday I will be a leader hehe..

Finally just want to thank you to Richard, my boss here, who has given me a chance to work parttime here and for his role model as a good leader.

Comfortable Vs Self Growth

It is my first time to write a journal like this. I've just get inspired with my flatmate who like to publish her writing in her blog, which is shared with some of her close friends from church. I think it is such a good idea, to share experience and thought with others. It is because you can encourage and strengthen each other by your story and opinion, of course the content must be presented in a good manner. Secondly, based on the subject that I am currently taking, Knowledge management, knowledge sharing is a powerful way of leveraging effiency. Anyway, my purpose is not to give you lecture about knowledge management hehe.. just want to share my thought these last couple weeks.

Probably some of you know that this is my last semester in my study period, and I have to go back to my home country after I finish my study in Sydney. At the moment I feel sad, scare mix with excitement to reunite with my family. I still remembered in the first and second semester of my uni, every day I wished I could finish and graduate quicker than it supposed to be. I envied with my friends, who have already completed their study and return to Indonesia. But now, I wish I could stay longer here rather than go back. It is funny, isn't it ?

Finally, I realised What's going on exactly ? Why I am so vulnerable changing my mind ? I think it is the matter of the comfortable. In the first semester of my study, I was struggling a lot. It is due to it was my first time come to foreign country to study. Still new with the environment especially with the academic culture then no family, no close friends who can to talk with, feel alone and cheerless. Then in the second semester was the hardest in my study period, which required me to take full credits. Haven't really emotionally settled with the environment yet, I had to face another challenge. It was really hard for me at that time to handle all of the subjects which I took. Sometimes, I thought why should I suffer so much, while before I came to Sydney, I already have had a good job, pretty good pay and really want to go home directly, and don't want to continue my study anymore. In short, I have passed all of them. Finally, I am in my last semester, which my wish will soon come true. getting closer to graduate, getting closer to go back home. but guess what, I don't feel happy at all thinking I have to return to where I am from. 'coz I've already adapted the situation here well, have lot of friends, have a parttime job which related to my field of study and more importantly I've also got used to the academic culture here. Conversely, I feel scared to return to Indonesia, thinking that I have to find a new job, start from the beginning again, face a messy, polluted and traffic jam atmosphere, and even one of the bomb blast target by terorists.

In this confusing situation, I introspect myself and looked back What I've been through. Compare what I am now with before I came to Sydney, including my attitude, spiritual life, way of thinking, knowledge and level of maturity. I've changed a lot and learnt a lot, I am a different person, of course better than before. I draw a conclusion that people are reluctant to love struggle and difficulties, they prefer to live comfortably, like I was going through. hate to live in sydney at first, but when I've settled everything down, I don't want to leave Sydney anymore. because I already feel more comfortable with living in Sydney rather than go back.

I must admit during my struggling time, I was forced to survive, which in turn give me more strength and more spiritual growth. If I looked back again, I was amazed and really thank you to God that He gave me such an opportunity to suffer so I can grow as I am now. What if I didn't get the opportunity to study here, probably I am still surround with my narrow thought, never grow bigger like bonsai. In James 1:3-4 says "because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything".

After all getting so many blessings and kindness from God, I must accept that I have to return to Indonesia. In anything, God has a perfect plan for us. I realised that I have to accept another challenge to keep my faith growing. I am not saying that we need to make ourselves in trouble in order to grow, but if we are facing such challenging situation we need to accept it and keep perseverance in God. Ultimately, it will strengthen us if we pass through it. and always remember 1 Cor 10:13 "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

Finally, I also want to give a big Thanks to my beloved older brother, who keep encourage and motivate me during my hard time while I were studying in Sydney. Edwin, Christine and other church and bible study fellows, colleagues, my flatmate who also have given me courage during my difficult circumstances.

"Decay starts when growth stops", Anon.